when my kid asks for the same thing.
again.
March 2013
15 posts
when someone asks if I want any more kids too soon after having one.
but in a few months, I am always…
oh you want to talk about the play date coming up?
again?
when my kid says the F word.
you.
me.
when you only have 1 school aged child.
this is what youre saying.
this is what I’m doing.
when they have been in bed for an hour.
and then miraculously are hungry/thirsty/too tired to even sleep.
when the school calls to tell me my kid doesn't feel well.
and I just turned on RHONY on the dvr.
when i try on pre-pregnancy pants.
what? I’m 3 weeks PP!!
i need wine.
and it’s the one thing that my husband didn’t bring home after work.
whoa. you have 4 kids?
Its date night.
when my kid says that they are tired.
and are ready to go to bed.
i just wish this would happen IRL.
so I could have a giggle.
when a mom comes to talk to me on the playground.
when teaching my toddler to play ball.
June 2012
23 posts
When my child asks the woman with the short hair why she is trying to be a boy.
When I get home from being alone at the store for 30 minutes.
submitted by: jenna
By day 3 of my diet
When a self-proclaimed supermom says her child did something wrong.
submitted by: jenna
When my kid poops her pants in public.
i’m all this on the outside
and like this on the inside
submitted by: jenna
the week or so after i have a baby.
and i get completely ready for the day.
PSA: what not to do.
when a mom doesn't stop their kid.
from doing ridiculous shit on the playground. bc she’s on her phone.
what i would do at work if they blocked mom boards.
dancing in the car when my kids arent there.
or if they are. whatever.
with a side of
starting slow with post baby exercise.
when someone tells me that i must have my hands full.
how i feel when someone tells me that their toddler still doesnt sleep through the night.
and mine have since babies.
i can’t help it.
after i out-mom someone on my mom board.
a kid-less friend asks if i can take a girls vacation.
and leave your children with my husband for the week.
when i start weight watchers.
and go to my first weigh in.
we all know what happens the 2nd week.
the kids didnt taste the veggies i hid in their food.
wait, breastfeeding isn't fool proof birth control?
poop or chocolate?
its 530pm.
What I want to do when my kids have the stomach flu and they come near me
submitted by: ashley
Play
Another mom tells me she can't bear to spend a night away from her kids
at first i’m like:
then i realize she’s serious:
and then i’m like:
submitted by: allison
May 2012
87 posts
when a mom tells me she's cloth diapering.
submitted by: adrienne
when a first time mom tries to educate me on childbirth.
submitted by: amjosiris
Oh your kid was potty trained at 12 months?
tell me all about how you did it and how advanced your kid is.
submitted by: mana
My husband in the delivery room.
submitted by: adrienne
when my hubby offers to do the night feeding.
when I finally get the baby down for a nap.
and the UPS guy rings the doorbell.
submitted by: adrienne
I GOT EIGHT HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT
submitted by: miranda
when my parents are in town and offer to watch my kid.
submitted by: adrienne
i dont like the mom. or kid. but they keep calling for playdates.
MommyJacking: Know-It-Alls Edition
This week on Mommyish, I talk about know-it-all parents on Facebook. This topic is a long time coming, because it’s a particular type of mommyjacking that annoys parents and non-parents alike. Unsolicited advice is irritating no matter what a person is being “advised” to do, but it’s especially annoying when it’s advice being doled out by “helpful” parents on Facebook.
What is it about some people that causes them to interject and act sanctimonious when there’s nothing to be sanctimonious about? It’s a daunting prospect. A person posts an innocent update and then suddenly she’s getting an earful from a member of the Parenting Hall Monitor Association. Like most mommyjacking sub-categories, it’s not always something that can be predicted. It can, however, give you a pretty good idea of who your friends are. Let’s check out some examples.
1. Lactivists
Kathy needs to pull the breast pump out of her ass and stop acting like a shrew. The onesie is a joke, and whether Izzie is breastfeeding and ‘pumping and dumping’ or isn’t breastfeeding at all is really none of Kathy’s business. Sugar-coating the condescension with “yummy Mama milky” takes this comment to baby talk heights of obnoxiousness. I’ve yet to see anything more annoying than an adult who talks like a toddler on the Internet.
2. One-Two Punch
I’m not sure why Caryn’s comment posted twice (four minutes apart), but it goes to show that you shouldn’t act like the SVP of Seatbelt Safety on Facebook. Once was kind of bitchy. Twice makes you sound like a lunatic. I understand why people get so concerned about seatbelt safety, but there are flight attendants whose job it is to pay attention to such things. Bringing it up makes you look like an asshole.
while i am in labor.
every time i hear the duggars are pregnant.
